Hey everybody,

We have no idea how many times disgruntled students threaten to shoot up schools, and kill others and then kill themselves. Schools are doing  a much better job at hearing these threats and intervening quickly, but there are many threats that don't come to the attention of school administrators. Yet after someone dies there is always a witness that comes forward, and relate that the person had said that they were going to hurt themselves.

I always wonder, why didn't the witness tell someone earlier?

I know I don't have to say this, but please talk to your children and tell them to let somebody know if they have friends that are threatening to hurt, maim, or kill themselves or somebody else. Listen, listen, listen to your teens.

If your teen broods over what they see as maltreatment, from the world. You may think that jumping in and supporting them, when they are wrong, will help, but actually it only makes the situation worse. The more they talk about the situation, often they become more irrational about the situation. They may conclude that their maltreatment is so severe that it warrants hurting others. They may hurt themselves to avoid punishment.

 I am amazed at how jealous young people can be. Jealousy is at the root of a lot of bullying. The bully may decide to hurt the person he is bullying, but just as often the victim of bullying may strike back. Due to feelings of  isolation, sadness, and fear bullied children may not see anyway out accept to destroy themselves and/or anyone whom they perceive is involved.

If a teen loses their girlfriend/boyfriend/best friend or if teens are feeling left out and excluded at school, and at home, this could lead to an all or nothing attitude towards solving their problem. The teen may feel the only way out of this is if they kill themselves and/or others.

There's many things that can be done to help:

1. If there has been a threat then get help for your family. I know we are aware of the teen's need for help, but get help for yourself. Find out if there is something you can do to help your teen.

2. Encourage socialization. Get your teen out and about with you and the extended family. Encourage healthy relationships with extended family members.

3. Speak hopefully. This is a time to speak hopefully in the presence of your teenager. Minimize problems, don't maximize problems. Pray with and for your teen.

4. Slow down. Keep a more regulated schedule.

5. Be honest and point out good things happening around them, to them, and for them. It's easy to focus on problems. Encourage teens to find something good in their lives.

This is a different age. Stress is affecting everyone, even small children. Encourage an environment of open communication and friendliness n your home. Encourage your children to see you as a person they can trust. Teach them to be open, and most importantly, if you see a problem, please encourage them to talk to you.

I was reading a newspaper article the other day, about another charter school is closing. These schools were to be an answer to what is considered a "failing" public school system. I don't know how charter schools were supposed to be an improvement over public schools in teaching children, but they were.

I assume teachers in charter schools were educated alongside with teachers in public schools setting. So the teachers' training wasn't that different. Unless colleges are graduating teachers who are already burnt out on the first day of their first job, new teachers' desire to teach and change the world one child at a time hasn't changed. Even teachers who has been around for a time, still speak with a glow about being able to teach young people.

 The students haven't changed. Children are children as far as I can tell. I will agree that technology is rivaling schools in keeping children's attention, but in every age there was something that was pulling a child's attention away from learning.

So what has changed?

These are only a few observations I have made.

I notice that the structure of the home has changed dramatically. Most homes have two individuals working to support the family, and single parents have to work, there are very few options for them. With these dramatic shifts in parental availability more and more is expected of schools.

Schools are encouraged, and in some cases under law have to teach students, not only reading, language, social studies, science, math, and physical education, they now have to teach about alternative lifestyles (homosexuality), health (safe sex) foreign language, drug education (don't use drugs) and social skills (anti bullying skills). Schools have group therapy sessions for students, so they can learn to keep their hands to themselves. (This blog article isn't long enough to discuss the issue of many students' insubordinate behavior.

It seems that all of these things are important to teach, but where does the extra time come from? I haven't noticed school days being any longer, neither have I noticed classroom sizes getting smaller. In fact the opposite, if these charter schools continue to fail then the already overburdened public schools will continue to "fail." Larger numbers of students in classes, more subjects to teach, and no extra time is a recipe for failure.

 Little by little, parental duties have shifted from parents to the school. What is the right thing to teach children about "alternative lifestyle"," health", and "social skills?" 

I admire teachers, and commend them for wanting to support the families, but aren't we dumping too much on the schools,a nd teachers especially? I would prefer for my child to have my values. I understand about "health" and it's importance, but what if I want to teach my child about true safe sex?

True education occurs in the home, around the dinner table, in short rides to the store, when the family is in crisis, and when they aren't in crisis. Instead of asking "why haven't the schools taught my little Johnny to read...", maybe we can read to little Johnny. If reading doesn't come easy to parents, then when the child learns to read, that is a good time for parents to start learning to read. arents can practice with their child.

Whatever happened to, if you want your child to be a reader, then you have to read to them and let them see you reading. Some schools are losing the academic battle for their students. Some students are lost before they ever enter school, and that's not the teacher's fault.

 I know that time is limited, but let's have the high and lofty goal of reading with our child daily. I can guarantee you, if you persist, your child will read much better and will improve in a very short time.

Let me know what your results are.