Hello everybody, not that I want to dwell on the dark side of life, however all parents need to be aware. It appear that our jobs are getting more and more complicated. I recently talked to two teen boys about their relationships with their girlfriends, when one of the teen boys told me that he and his girlfriend has violence in their dating relationship.
     I looked at him incredibly. He stated it as if he was stating that the weather was good. I could hardly believe my ears. The other boy piped in, "yea me too.  The girls don't mind." I asked him if they were hitting girls, they both replied "no," however I have a creepy feeling that there is some physical violence in the relationships. They both stated that they are just verbally abusive.
     I know that this isn't just boys being abusive to girls, I know that there are girls out there who are physically and verbally abusive to teen boys. Now what? Do we have to go on dates with teens (just joking)?  : )
     But seriously, this domestic violence in teen relationships is scary. Teens have been killed in these relationships.
     Those teenage boys didn't think anything bad about hurting girls verbally. They thought it  was funny and giggled about their behavior. They justified the nonsense by stating the girls aren't hurt because they are equally abusive.
    Parents talk, talk, talk, to your teens. Both, boys and girls, need to be educated about the warning signs of domestic.


These are some other suggestions that might be helpful:
1. Teach teens that jealousy and controlling behavior isn't love.
2. Teach teens to communicate assertively and nonaggressively.
3. Be observant and available.
4. Encourage open communication about friends in general and boyfriends and girlfriends especially.
5. Pray a lot for your teens.


     If you have any more suggestions or ideas please share. This is very important.


    

Hey everybody, welcome to our first blog for younger children. I hope we inspire you into action, encourage you into better living and help you build better relationships with your children.
“Each tree had 56 oranges. If 8 slaves pick them equally, then how much would each slave pick?” and “If Frederick got two beatings per day, how many beatings did he get in 1 week?”
 
    That's right, some teacher felt it was okay to pass this out to children. I tell you the job of a parent is relentless. Now parents have to go to work manage their jobs there and make sure some unenlightened person isn't filling their child's head up with nonsense! Ignorance is dangerous! I'm sure this teacher didn't intend any harm (I hope). Yet here it is in black and white in 2012.

    Fortunately, the parents were quick to act and got the worksheets pulled from the classroom, but that's one worksheet that they caught. Who knows what else was done in the classroom that wasn't seen by parents?  We can't be everywhere at all times. It is too much to work and worry all day about what some unenlightened person may say to our children. We must admit, we have no control. This incident is why it's so important for parents, to listen, listen, listen and talk, talk, talk to your children. 
    Since we have no control over other people's mouths it's important to teach our children to think for themselves and make decisions for themselves. We can't start this process soon enough.

Here are some helpful hints:
     1)  Encourage independent thinking, by asking them what they think.
     2). Never ridicule their opinions.
     3). If you don't know the answer say "I don't know."
     4). Do research with them to find answers.
     5). Discuss current events, and encourage them to make inferences from informaton given.

What are you doing to encourage independent thinking?

Hello everybody, First I am happy to report that this blog will cover not only teens but small children as well. We will post teen issues on Saturday nights, and we will post blogs for children on Wednesdays. Those are our high and lofty goals.
****

Now back to the pressing issue. Teen dating. I am surprised at how involved parents are in their children's llives. I was talking to some young people and found out that parents of twelve year olds are taking them on dates. Parents are dropping their tweens off at the movies so that they can meet little boyfriends and girlfriends. SMH

Why are parents doing this? These moments (between twelve and fourteen year olds) are parents last few moments of peace of mind. Soon parents will have to worry about mature teens dating and breaking up and all the problems that comes with teen dating. Why would anyone rush children into this complicated and scary stage of life.

I don't believe young people this age are mature enough to handle the pressures, strong feelings or the rejection that comes with this type of relationship.

What happened to children having crushes, sending little love notes across the room, and smiling shyly. I assume all of that is dead. Today it's rush, rush, rush, to the next stage of life. Let's let children be little children. They grow up all by themselves fast enough. What do you think?

Incidentally, would you take your older teens on dates?

I can't believe that I read some folks are advocating that it's healthy for teenagers to have sex regularly. Obviously these "know it alls " aren't responsible for taking care of  teens 24/7.

Anybody who lives with or used to live with teenagers, know that teens can't remember to turn off lights, brush their teeth, take baths, complete their chores, and the list goes on and on.  Some teens have to be reminded to attend classes that they go to school to attend everyday.

I can't believe there's someone out there trying to increase the work of a parent.

We're already responsible for their food, drink, housing, clothing, academics, future, past, and every other little facet of their lives. Now we will be held responsible, if they get too much sex, not enough sex, their birth control and any children, and/or diseases that are created from these sexual encounters. When these teens become adults they will blame us for their high blood pressure, blood clots or some other chronic illness they get as a result from the longterm use of birth control medication.

Really? I can't believe there are adults out there, (they have to be self serving) who thinks that it is a good idea to encourage sexual activity among teenagers. I believe that if we add sexual freedom, with the impulsive nature of tenagers, we will have a complete mess on our hands. It's messy enough already.

I am truly old fashioned. I believe in sex after marriage. I recommend to every teen (boys and girls), that they remain a virgin - and enjoy the status - until they are married. Did you know that many (and I mean a lot) teenagers don't even know what a virgin is?

I remember sitting next to someone in a seminar who worked to teach teens about birth control. She offered to come and speak to teens that I know. I politely declined the invitation, and reiterated to her that we recommend abstinence. She quickly rambled off the rate of teen pregnancy stating that it is proven that abstinence doesn't work. I pointed out those statistics proved that birth control doesn't work either.

Let's start a new sexual revolution. We will name it "abstinence." So let's speak up, say the word "virgin/abstinence" to your teens. Encourage them to go beyond avoiding pregnancy. Let's encourage them to be virgins. Remember, we have the power to educate, but we have no control over what is done with the education.

What are you teaching your teens, and how are you teaching them?